LOVE THY NEIGHBOR........?

Well, I've been thinking about this subject for quite awhile.

A bad neighbor can be your worst nightmare. They can make your life hell.

I happen to live in a lovely, older neighborhood where people interact with each other....but not too much.....we all look out for each other and keep an eye on each other's property when we know someone is gone...but we don't get into each other's business.

I am fortunate to have wonderful neighbors on either side of me, and I have become good friends with one of them.

Many of us have front porches where we can sit and enjoy a nice day. We have beautiful old shade trees, quiet streets and a nice mix of old and young people. Most of us have dogs, including me.

When I first moved in here, almost eight years ago, I noticed how many people walked down the street every day with their dogs, and I was impressed at how quiet the neighborhood was, despite the number of dogs that seemed to be everywhere. It was just a kind of unwritten law that we all be considerate of each other and not allow our dogs to bark longer than about 30 seconds. Also, everyone, with the exception of the occasional jerk, carries a plastic bag to clean up after their animal as they're taking their walk.

Over this past 7+ years, we've really only had two people who have been obnoxious about allowing their dogs to bark....one of them, thank God, moved soon after an ugly incident and we were all very happy to see them go. The other, a young couple who had just moved in two doors down from me, started creating a disturbance the first day. So typical of young people today, they have this sense of entitlement and disregard for others. They would leave their Labradoodle out all day long with no water and no food in all kinds of weather while they were at work. I live in the Midwest so it gets pretty cold here in the Winters and awfully hot and humid in the Summers. We would hear this poor dog barking and barking at all hours, including in the wee hours of the night, even when they were home. It's like they just dumped the dog outside so it wouldn't bother them. My guess is that they never took the time to house train her when she was a puppy so she was making messes in the house. Instead of correcting the problem, they just tossed her outside.

What puzzled all of us the whole time we were dealing with this particular neighbor, was the fact that during the wee hours of the night when this dog was barking and howling, they were home....their bedroom had to be somewhere close to their backyard....how could THEY not have been annoyed enough to stop this noise? This dog had a bark so loud that people across the street and everyone up and down the street were disturbed....so how did they sleep through that?

My next door neighbor had it especially hard because these idiots live right next to her and her bedroom windows were open this one night when the dog was particularly obnoxious right around 3:00 in the morning.
(This was just one of many of such nights for a period of many months.)

Long story short: She finally went over to their house...remember this was 3:00 in the morning..and beat on the door until this couple answered. Their attitude was one of irritated amazement that anyone would dare bother THEM this time of night. When she asked them to shut the dog up, their response was "Well, we can let our dog bark if we want to."

WRONG!! My neighbor then called the police and these two dingbats found out that (1) there IS a noise ordnance. (2) you can NOT allow your dog to bark at ANY time for any length of time. (3) You will be fined if you don't comply.....which did happen because they made the mistake of deciding the law didn't apply to them. (We weren't blaming the dog, either. She just wanted inside where it was warm when it was cold out, and relief from the heat and a drink of water when it was hot outside, and some love and companionship from her owners. Not too much to ask.)

Since that little run-in, and the resulting fine they had to pay, we have not heard a peep out of that dog again. But, what a shame it had to come to that. Now, instead of them becoming a part of the neighborhood, we are all sorry they moved here.

Now, we are facing one more problem of a different kind with one other neighbor who lives behind us.

This is an old couple....probably in their 70's. They have most likely lived here forever, and have the attitude that because they've lived here so long they can do whatever they want; they believe they own the neighborhood, I guess. The problem is more with the man than his wife. He has this huge garage that would hold three cars and it is his work shop. None of us have been able to figure out what the devil he does in there all day long, but he is out there from 6:00am until around dark, (which in the Summer can mean 9:00pm or later), 7 days a week in nice weather. He opens those garage doors, which face our back yards, turns on his annoying talk radio station to full volume and proceeds to run a generator, hammer metal and wood, run a power saw, throw metal pipes, tools, or whatever all over the cement floor, which makes an ungodly clanging racket......and he does this all day.

This man seems to be completely oblivious to the fact that he's not alone in this neighborhood. It's like living across from a factory. None of us can open our back doors to catch a breeze on a lovely day because the noise is so loud you can't even hear your TV in your livingroom. Nor can you enjoy your own backyard. You can't just sit outside and listen to the birds, or have family over for a cookout because the noise is so awful that you can't hear each other talk. So, on nice days, you are left with the choice to either put up with it, or lock yourself inside your house and turn up the volume on your TV and try to drown out the sounds of this guy banging around outside.

Then to add to the aggravation, both he and his wife have decided that all the trash cans which line the alley between our houses, belong to them, too,(these are the huge ones provided by the city and are emptied each week by the type of truck that lifts them automatically)..and they fill our trash cans with their trash...to the point that we can't even use them ourselves sometimes. He has lots of scrap wood, and metals and whatever that he throws into our receptacles...like he owns them.

He made the mistake of doing that to me ONCE. I took all the trash out of there and threw it right in front of his garage door in a nasty pile and then put a note on the can saying "DO NOT THROW YOUR TRASH INTO MY TRASH CAN! IT'S RUDE!" He hasn't done it me since, but he continues to do it to other neighbors.

I did go over there one day when he was in his lair because he'd had that generator going all day and by late afternoon I'd had enough. I wanted to strangle him, but I kept my cool when I asked him what all that noise was. He pointed to the far side of the garage and said, "It's my generator." I looked around and said, "Well, are you using it right now?" "No", he says, irritated. I looked at him for a minute and then said, "Then would you please shut it down? I am tired of listening to it." He did, but he wasn't happy. His parting shot was, "I'll use it whenever I need it!" I said, "Fine. And when you don't, shut it off."

This has been going on for about four years now....but has gotten worse each year. I have made a vow that it will not go on another year. I found myself being glad when the weather is lousy and cold because then he isn't out there disturbing the peace, and I'm dreading the nice weather to come because I know he'll be back out there every single nice day ruining it for everyone else. I just don't want to feel that way anymore. I, and the rest of us around here, have rights, too.

I'm done. I will take whatever legal action required to shut him up. It wouldn't be so bad if he was just out there puttering around quietly....even if he would just lay the metal whatevers down instead of throwing them across the cement floor...or if he would not start at 6:00am every morning, including weekends, and continue on until dark........that kind of constant noise can drive a person crazy....and I'm about there.
Honestly, I don't know why none of us has taken the necessary steps to put a stop to this much sooner....but, I will this year.

No one else around here acts like jerks and annoys others....and now that the dog I mentioned is quiet, this man is the only one.

I don't want him to not have his hobbies, or not enjoy his work shop, or whatever the heck he's doing out there. All I am asking is for him to be considerate about the hours and the noise level. I don't think that's unreasonable.

Most of us live in neighborhoods where our homes are close together. Not everyone can enjoy the peace and privacy of the country....nor does that suit everyone....if you are not considerate of each other it can be absolute hell...and it can get out of hand as fast as a wildfire.

We live in a scary society these days. Things are tough economically. People are angry, lonely, stressed, and impatient. They feel boxed in, crowded, infringed upon and up against a wall and it doesn't take much to push someone over the edge to the point of losing it. Neighbors shoot each other all the time because of just the types of things I've mentioned. Police hate neighbor disputes as much as domestic disputes because they are the most violent and dangerous...to everyone involved. Too many people have the attitude of entitlement and selfishness, and "I-don't-give-a-rat's-behind about anyone but me." They are rude, arrogant and pushy......a dangerous combination.

There was a fascinating behavioral study done years ago with rats, (because they are a lot like us). Scientists put a huge number of rats into a confined space to see what they'd do. It didn't take long for the rats to become agitated. Then more and more aggressive towards each other, until they became psychotic and began to kill each other. Sound familiar?

Are we no better than rats?

Whatever happened to the Golden Rule?