TIME FOR CREATIVITY

Well, once again it's been ages since I've written anything. Mostly it's been apathy, I guess.

Since I've retired...or, I should say semi-retired, since although I don't go out and work anymore, I still run my business from my home office...I too often found myself flopped down on my couch watching the Boob Tube all day....and I mean ALL day! Mindless, brain-numbing crap, for the most part.

I refuse to watch commercials (I have DVR and record all programs automatically that I want to watch, which enables me to zip past the intelligence insulting garbage in about 5 seconds)...but some of the programs aren't much better.

Anyway, I woke up one day and decided that enough was enough and I had to shake myself out of this apathetic nonsense, so I went out and bought a canvas and some acrylic paints, and I did two paintings, photos of which I've put at the top of this posting.

I am an artist. I have been since I was a child, but I'm not the type of artist that feels compelled to paint constantly and in great quantities. I will paint for awhile, maybe two or three paintings, and then won't do any for years. When I lived in New Mexico I was probably the most active; it is an inspiring place, perfect for an artist. Since I came back to Ohio in 1995, I hadn't picked up a paintbrush until the beginning of this year, even though I had one particular subject in mind for years. The photo you see at the top of this post is of that painting. (The bottom photo is of the Taos Pueblo, a 4' x 5' monster that I did for my youngest daughter, special order.) :)

I wanted to do something involving an old trailer park...I have no idea where that came from....but it haunted me ever since I first came back here to Ohio from New Mexico. My youngest daughter Janeen and I drove around one day in the not-so-nice part of town finding old parks and taking pictures of the rattiest trailers and broken down cars. I wanted the painting to have a feeling of the 1940's, and a bit of desolation,I wanted it to be in the desert, and I wanted the name of the trailer park to be "Sunset Trailer Park".

I had a sort of idea in mind of how I wanted it to look, but when I began to paint it, the brush may have been in my hand, but it took on a life of its own and I found myself just along for the ride.

I had no title in mind while I was working on it, and when it was all finished, I looked at it for awhile and knew the only title that would fit was "Her Dad's Guardian".

The man in the painting is a nod to my deceased ex-husband, and the dog is my own sweet little Poppy who loved him and followed him everywhere...she was his guardian. She was probably the only being in his life who loved him absolutely unconditionally...as our dogs do, God bless them!

My ex had his issues with alcohol. It took everything away from him...everything...including his life. It was a long, slow, painful path of destruction, and extremely sad for all of us who loved him to watch. He was very alone all his life..it didn't matter how many people loved him; it didn't matter how many people he surrounded himself with, he was alone. There was something inside him that wouldn't allow him to be happy or successful. He would head towards something good, some success..and hit a brick wall in his mind and turn back onto that path of destruction. He would do outrageous things to loved ones that would push us away, while reaching for us at the same time. I think we all felt like yo-yos..and the string finally broke, as a well-worn string tends to do.

Some things just can't be repaired.

Anyway, when I painted the man in the picture, and the dog, I knew who they were. It was the painting I had to do; the one that wouldn't allow me to dismiss it, and the one that told a story that had to be told.

The painting lives in my oldest daughter's home now. When she saw it she immediately laid claim to it; it spoke to her as it did to me, and I'm glad it's with her...I think she understands where it came from.