MY NEW YEAR'S WISH FOR YOU

To All Of You:

May you find happiness and peace in the coming year.

May your artistic talent (whatever it may be) be honed to a fine, bright edge, even greater than it already is.

May you find many new wonderful friends everywhere you go, treasure the ones you have, and reconnect with old friends with whom you've lost touch.

May you feel fulfilled in all aspects of your life: spiritually, physically, emotionally.

May you find sunshine even on cloudy days, and always appreciate the beauty that surrounds you.

May you always have an attitude of gratitude, even for the small things....and, remember: the TRULY precious things in life are free!

Most of all.....may you always be able to love, and to know that you are loved!

ON A SILVER SCREEN

ON A SILVER SCREEN

My Son! You are searching so hard

for Life's answers.

You won't find them where you've

been looking!

Listen to me:

Seeking answers of my own one day,

I took a walk into the faded-blue depths

of an old man's eyes.

I sat in the sunny meadow of his soul

where Time was only a teacher--

not a ravager.

There, on Time's silver screen,

like the everchanging clouds in our own galaxy,

were the shapes of the knowledge I'd been seeking.

I watched the epic of his lifetime

reeled out into the forms of comedy and tragedy.

I listened to distant thunderheads,

and felt the salty rain falling gently upon the meadow.

But...closer and stronger

was the healing laughter that followed,

melting away the storm.

My Grandfather's last gift to me--

and his greatest!

I wrote this poem many years ago in honor of my Grandfather, who passed away from a brain tumor. While we were apart for many years (I lived in California and he lived here in Ohio), when I returned to Ohio in 1973 we became very close, and we had a lot of good times together. When he was in his final days in the hospital, I spent time with him, just sitting there beside him, thinking about the wise things he'd said to me before he became ill. One of the last things he did, when he hadn't been responding to anyone, was to squeeze my hand when I told him I loved him.

The first paragraph of the poem was a reference to my own son who was having a hard time during that period when we first moved back to Ohio from his native California. He was not happy with me for taking him away from all his friends, and didn't understand why...or, maybe he did understand at some level...but, hated it anyway.

In my way, I was trying to tell him that it would be okay....and it was.

A CHRISTMAS MIRACLE

Hello Again!

I know it's been awhile, but I was compelled to write this tonight after a really amazing event that happened to me this evening....one which restored my faith in people...a Christmas miracle, if you will.

We all know how awful the economy is right now. Everyone is suffering. Everyone is worried about how they are going to survive this nightmare.
People are greedy; people are self-involved, selfish, dishonest, uncaring and out for #1...right?

Wrong. There ARE still some honest people out there! Even in this economy. Even though it's the Holiday season and everyone is wondering how they are going to buy, buy, buy those gifts, impress their friends, throw that spectacular holiday bash....etc etc.

Those who are less fortunate, maybe less honest, may be thinking about how they can scam, rob, or take advantage of whatever opportunity presents itself, even if it's at the detriment of another.

But, tonight, I learned that there are still people in this world who live by the code of ethics.....and, one bell-ringer for the Salvation Army is one of these beautiful people!

I went to the grocery store late this afternoon, rushing as usual. Going through the automated doors, into the store lobby, I passed the lady ringing the bell for the Salvation Army, but didn't really pay full attention. However, because I'm an artist and a writer, and detail-oriented, I did notice her lovely dark eyes, her sweet expression, her smooth mocha skin. I noticed the symmetry of her black knitted hat, red jacket and black pants, and I remember thinking that I was glad she was inside the lobby of the store rather than outside in the awful cold, windy weather. There was just something about her that did catch my attention, despite my hurried state, and I smiled at her and said hello....but, I never carry cash so I didn't have anything to put into the little red bucket...and on I went inside.

I did the little bit of shopping I had to do....I didn't have much money to spend so it didn't take me long. I loaded the groceries into the trunk and started home. One of the things I wanted to buy was a rotisserie chicken...but, I had forgotten it. I remembered when I got about half-way home....and I really wanted that chicken...so, I turned back, went back into the store, bought it, and headed for home once again.

It wasn't until I got all the way home before I realized I didn't have my purse! Where had I left it?? In full panic mode, I flew back to the store, sick to my stomach, in tears, praying to God all the way there: "PLEASE, let me find my purse! PLEASE, God!!" I had no cash in there, but replacing my ATM bank card, credit cards, insurance cards, drivers license, etc....all that stuff, plus other things, would be an absolute nightmare! My prescription medications, ........well, just everything! And, how much damage could a thief do with my credit cards in a small amount of time before I had time to cancel everything? Not to mention identity theft. It would be catastrophic!

When I got to the store, I was shaking like a leaf...just a mess! I walked through the automatic doors, into the store, and I noticed the same Salvation Army bell-ringer who had been there earlier. I kind of looked at her, but didn't really see her ....my mind was elsewhere. I know I had a panicked look on my face.

I rushed up to the check stands, looking for the cashier who had waited on me..thinking maybe I'd left my purse at the check stand....but he wasn't there. More panic. Then I went to the customer service window, hope slim by then, and asked if anyone had turned in a purse. The girl said, "Yes."
I couldn't believe my ears! Then, immediately, I thought, Well, okay, if, by some miracle, it's mine, it's probably missing every credit card and all my medications!

Oh ye of little faith!

The girl handed over my purse, and I could immediately tell that nothing had been disturbed. The zippers were exactly as I had left them. I said, "Who turned it in?" Then, behind me, I heard a soft voice, "I did. You left it in the cart." and when I turned around, there was the Salvation Army bell-ringer. I just fell apart! I grabbed her and hugged her, saying "Oh, God bless you!!" I hugged her for so long, just sobbing with relief. She hugged me back, and I can't explain how comforted I felt...I never wanted to let go! I just couldn't believe my luck! Evidently, I had picked up the bag with the chicken in it and just left my purse behind in the cart before walking out the grocery store doors. She said she noticed it after I had gone, and she took it straight to Customer Service.

Finally, we walked out together, back to the lobby. I felt so bad because I didn't have anything to give her....then I remembered a dollar bill that had been in my wallet forever. I pulled it out and gave it to her to put into the bucket...but, I felt that was so inadequate. I wanted to do more...for HER.

I called my oldest daughter and told her what happened. She said, "Mom, I know exactly who you mean..I was there myself this evening and did some shopping, and I put $10 in that bucket...and I never do that!"

Wow!

I told my daughter that I wanted to do more for this woman and planned to go back tomorrow when I could give her a really nice card with $50 in it as a gift for her personally. My daughter said, "Call the store and find out if this same bell-ringer will be there tomorrow."

So I called. I got a clerk at first who didn't know anything and put me on hold. While you are on hold, they play music.....guess what the song was while I was waiting to talk to the store manager? "CALLING ALL ANGELS"! How appropriate was that?! This lovely woman was most definately my angel!

When the store manager got on the line, he told me that that bell-ringer had been there for several days so it was likely she'd be there tomorrow.

And tomorrow, I will get a special card for this lady, put $50 cash into it and hand it to her. I will again hug her tightly, and wish her a blessed Christmas...and I will be thanking God for putting her into my life this brief moment in time....because here's what that encounter did:
#1: She saved me from a nightmare of replacing all that I would have lost if she hadn't returned my purse intact. She kept a dishonest person from getting it.
#2: She restored my battered faith in people.
#3: My daughter and I had had a discussion earlier today about how people never did what they were supposed to do, didn't keep promises, and she was pretty disillusioned. I told her she should have more faith, but I really didn't feel it in my heart, even as I was telling her that. This lady gave my daughter an example of why she should believe that not all people are bad.
#4: Who knows how much good that $10 my daughter put into that lady's bucket will do? (Remember, she put that into the bucket BEFORE I called her and told her about this incident.) I can't help but feel that God was working this whole thing in order to teach several lessons to several people!!

I know I learned something valuable; something priceless...and so did my daughter.

We truly have an AWESOME God! You just never know when He will put someone in our path to teach us through His love and wisdom.

Be aware and be open to the lessons! You just never know when they will appear.

Have a beautiful Holiday Season, everyone!

Hello all...

I just wanted to add this to the post today, November 26, 2008.

This afternoon I bought a thank you card for the wonderful woman who turned in my purse yesterday, and I put a $50 bill into the card, sealed it in the envelope and took it to her.
I gave her another hug, and asked her her name so that I can call the Salvation Army and let them know about her.

She was astounded by the gift. I hope it makes her Holiday just a little brighter...because she sure made mine happier!

HERE A JOB, THERE A JOB....

I have been working since I was sixteen years old, and quite a bit of that time I have had more than one job at a time. That's what you do when one job isn't enough to meet your needs...and New Mexico was no exception.

I knew the job at the pharmacy would not be enough; I've already mentioned that the pay was pretty low and the cost of living high, so after about a week, I started looking for an additional job and found one at a housekeeping agency as a cleaner...something I'd never done (at least not for pay) before. (My daughter was still working at the fast food restaurant, but had been promoted to manager. This allowed her to switch to days and put Joey into day care so that he had other kids to play with.)

The housekeeping job was definitely hard work...but, that's never bothered me. I always take pride in any job I do, so I managed to become quite good at this cleaning thing.

Meanwhile, as I told you in my previous post, I had told my boss at the pharmacy that I would give him one month to see the quality of my work and to give me a raise, and if I didn't get it, I would have to leave. Well, at the end of the month I got my paycheck and (surprise, surprise) the raise was not on it, so I went to his office to discuss it with him. His response was that the "home office was not giving any raises to anyone" and he was really sorry, blah blah blah, and he hoped I'd stay. I said good-bye.

On my way home from the pharmacy, I stopped in at the housekeeping agency and told my boss there that I would be available for more hours.

I continued with the housekeeping agency for another two months as a cleaner...then, one day, the owner, knowing that I had had previous experience as an executive secretary in Akron for an insurance company, approached me and asked if I'd be interested in working in the office instead of out in the field. More money, and certainly a lot easier job, so I jumped at the chance.

This was the turning point; another absolute life-changing event, and where "The Secret" once again came into play. The first and most important life-changing event was when we moved to New Mexico...that started the whole chain of events that put me on the correct path to success.

Running the office, seeing how the business worked, one day I just had an epiphany and I knew I could do this myself! I mean, it was a light bulb moment! I just knew, without a doubt, that I could and should start my own housekeeping business, and that it would be a total success!

So I began to plan. The first thing I did was to buy a Rolodex and put it on my desk at work. I told myself, as I looked at it every day, that one day soon that Rolodex would contain the names of my own clients.

One of the points of "The Secret" is "The Law of Attraction". This means that you put in front of you what you want to draw towards you: pictures of a car or house you want, the job you want, the vacation....whatever. Put your wishes on a cork board and hang it on a wall where you see the things you have pinned on it every day, and KNOW that you will get those things! Don't just hope....KNOW it!

That Rolodex was my focus, and I didn't realize that I was putting The Secret into motion..that book didn't exist back then, and I had never heard of the concept. But, of course, things don't just fall out of the sky into your lap..you have to take steps to make your dreams come true...and my first step was to choose a name for my new business: Cinderella. It was perfect, because when you hear that name, what does it make you think of immediately? Cleaning, right? Then I had to design a flier, type it up (no computers at that time in my life) and then take $50.00 and go to the nearest print shop and have 500 fliers printed up....and then deliver them, door to door until they were all gone. I truly enjoyed this! It was such fun to see the neighborhoods and the courtyards where people had little hideaways full of pots of flowers, small ponds with Koi fish in them, and benches and tables where they could sit and enjoy their little private havens. I love the architecture in New Mexico.

It took a little over a week to deliver all the fliers, (which I did after work, and on the weekend) and every day at my desk I would look at that Rolodex and envision my future clients' names in it.

Finally, calls started coming in....and they kept on coming in...until I had enough clients where I couldn't handle them alone. So I hired a girl to work for me....and I gave my notice at the housekeeping agency.

I was on my way!

Time to say good-bye again. It is 2:25 a.m. on August 16, 2008. Way past my bedtime!

OUR HOUSE BECOMES A HOME

I left you in the last post at the end of our first day in our new home in New Mexico. Bear had disappeared, and we were going to set out on our job hunts the next morning. There was no time to waste if we were going to succeed in this new adventure!

The Secret was continuously at work. (Remember The Secret? That's what this series is all about.) I knew we would be fine; I visualized a positive outcome in the job hunt, and knew we'd get jobs immediately. And we did.

Nothing fancy at first; we weren't proud. We were willing to take whatever was available the quickest....when you take as big a step as we did, you don't sit around waiting for "the perfect job"....empty days do not pay the rent! My daughter got a job at a fast food place, and, since I had years of experience as a pharmacy technician and in doctors' offices, I answered an ad for a tech at a large pharmacy chain. The pay was abysmal compared to what I made here in Ohio...NM had a high cost of living with a low wage rate.....but, like I said...empty days do not pay the rent, so I took the job....with one stipulation: I told the manager that, with my experience, I was worth more, but I understood that they didn't know me and I needed to prove myself. I said I would give them one month, and then, if they were happy with my performance, I would expect a substantial raise. If I didn't get the raise, I would have to quit. They agreed, and I would start the next day.

I went home and began to put the house more in order, unpacking the rest of the stuff and taking care of Joey while Maureen, my daughter, went to her job that evening. She was going to work nights and I would work days so that one of us would always be available to take care of Joey.

While I was putting some things away in the front room, I thought I heard something....like a small, plaintive wail. I opened the front door, and there stood Bear, sporting a much smaller middle, his long hair in need of some brushing, but otherwise none the worse for wear....and obviously hungry. It had been two days. First things first: he darted past me and ran into the kitchen, looking for food, which I immediately provided for him, along with a nice bowl of clean, cool water. After he had a full belly again, he allowed me to pet him.....but not before he made it clear that if we EVER put him through such a long trip again, he was done with us for good! Bear had a way of "talking" to us with a series of little sounds and we learned which ones meant what pretty quickly. He was definitely ticked off, but willing to forgive...after all, we did have food and a warm place to stay...and a cat's gotta do what a cat's gotta do. (Picture him sitting up on his haunches, paws out in front of him and turned upward, weighing his options. "Let's see: staying in the wild and foraging for food, being cold and hungry....or......forgiving the stupid humans and being spoiled, pampered, fed and sleeping on a nice, warm comfortable bed.....yeah. No contest.")

The next day, I went to work at my new job.

Time to leave you again....but, please come back. There is still much to share with you.
It is 4:08 p.m., August 9, 2008.

HOME....AT LAST...IN NEW MEXICO.

When I left you, we had arrived at our new home and Bear had vanished in a gray flash.

There was nothing we could do at the moment about Bear; we just had to hope he would decide to get over his snit and come home.

Exhausted by this time, we wearily went in to explore our new home. It hadn't been lived in for about three months, but it was clean and welcoming...and we were very pleased with it. The only thing we objected to were the two uninvited guests that greeted us right inside, to the right of the front door: two very large black widow spiders. They had to go, first thing...sorry, ladies! Once they were dispatched, we continued to explore.

One story, and deceptively small-looking from the outside, it surprised us once we entered. It contained three large bedrooms...and the garage had been turned into a fourth. It was the biggest bedroom, and I took that one...1 1/2 baths, a huge kitchen and dining room, huge living room, and a wonderful sun room/den that quickly became our favorite room. It had 8 large windows and a wood burning stove that, in that room, was the only source of heat. It had obviously been added on after the house was built, but not included in the central air system. The air conditioning was a swamp-cooler located on the roof....typical for that area, and very efficient because of the dry climate. For those of you who are not familiar with that type of cooler: it's an evaporative system with a large fan blower contained in a large, square apparatus which has straw filters on the sides and a small copper tube that comes from a water source at the ground level. The water continuously comes up the tube, fills the bottom of the cooler and wets the straw filters, and then the cooled air blows into the house with quite a bit of force when you turn it on high. (There were medium and low speeds, too, but we liked it high on hot days.)

There was no basement in the house...also typical of most of the houses of this type in the Southwestern part of the U.S.

There was a good-sized laundry room as well. In the sun room, there was a back door that led out to the backyard and patio, which were wonderfully private. There was also a side yard that contained a small storage shed.

The front, side and back yards all needed a lot of attention...it was obvious that the previous tenants had been yardwork-challenged...but the front yard contained a wonderful nectarine tree, and a lovely cactus garden along side the driveway, the side had two beautiful flowering plum trees, and, in the backyard, was the most gorgeously prolific sweet Bing cherry tree, right outside the back door! (Both the nectarine and cherry trees provided us with such delicious fruit for all the years we lived there, though it was a battle with the birds for the cherries!)

As I said, the garage had been turned into a bedroom so there was only a carport with room for one car. One thing we loved was the fact that the house was in a cul-de-sac right off a not-too-busy side street. This was good since we had a three year old.

After exploring all the rooms, we began unloading the van, car and U-Haul trailer. By that evening, we were pretty much settled in, and, after some fast food for dinner, fell into bed exhausted....(well, my daughter and grandson fell into their beds...I had an air mattress...which was surprisingly comfortable. It was about 6 months before I could afford a bed.)

The next day, we began the job searches.

Time to say good-bye again. I leave you at 3:05 p.m. on Wednesday, August 6, 2008. Blog hits are now at 363.

CONTINUING WITH NEW MEXICO...1989-90

I left you, the last post, on the day of our departure from the Midwest, on the beginning of our journey to New Mexico, September 8, 1989. My birthday.

In the small U-Haul trailer hooked to the back of the van my daughter was driving were our clothes, some household items, treasures that couldn't be replaced, some bedding, some small pieces of furniture, and not much else. I also had more things piled in my trunk and in my back seat. (We did take the bed for my 3 year old grandson...and I don't remember if we kept my daughter's bed or not..but I think we did....however, I had sold mine so I didn't have one. It was a gigantic canopied water bed with huge mirrors in the ceiling of the canopy (don't ask!) 4 drawers on each side of the base, tall, built-in shelves at the foot, and it would have been totally impractical to haul it. I did take a huge (about 4 1/2 ft tall) cactus that I had purchased here and had used as a Christmas tree, white mini-lights, Southwestern ornaments and all. (When we came back here in 1995 I bought a ficus tree that was about 5 feet tall and used that as a Christmas tree....I never was one for conventionality; the child ain't right! I still have that ficus...only it's now 8 feet tall!) How ironic that I bought that cactus here in OH where you wouldn't expect to find one that big, and I don't recall ever seeing one for sale like that in NM where you'd expect to find one! I loved that cactus and had it the whole time we lived in NM...and, once there, it got huge flowers on it every Summer...(I like to think of those blossoms as a "thank you" for bringing it back home to its natural habitat!) I sold it to a client in NM just before we came back here to the Midwest in 1995.

Also traveling in the van with my daughter and grandson, was our gray, long-haired cat named Bear...who didn't know he was a cat. He never used a litter box; (he went to the door and waited to be let out when he needed to go), he liked traveling in the car, and he acted more like a dog than a cat. My daughter made him a bed on the engine compartment that, in this type of van, was a high hump between the seats, so he could lie there and look out at the passing scenery. How many cats do you know that like to ride in a car? He wasn't in a crate, either.

We hit highway 70 west and the first day we made it to St. Louis, MO, somehow managing to stay together, before stopping for the night. We couldn't really travel too fast, obviously, but we weren't in any hurry anyway. It was a beautiful Fall day and we planned to enjoy our adventure.

We put out food and water in the motel room for Bear, and fashioned a litter box for him...we couldn't very well let him outside....but, not being a litter box type of cat, he would have nothing to do with it. We figured eventually he'd have to use it....right? He was too dignified to allow himself to potty in the house; he never had had any kind of accident the whole time we'd had him so we knew he wouldn't lose his dignity now.

The next morning we checked the litter box. There was a tiny little wet spot, but nothing else....and Bear was throwing mildly dirty looks our way.

On day two, after breakfast, we again hit the road, dropping down to highway 44, headed for Tulsa, Oklahoma, where we would then pick up US 40, which would take us into Amarillo, Texas, and then into Albuquerque. We figured we should make it in about 4 days or so, total.

We made it to Tulsa that evening and again stopped for the night. We were averaging a little over 350 miles each day. Again we put down food and water and the makeshift litter box for Bear. The next morning, there was once more a tiny wet spot and nothing else....and Bear's looks were growing darker and more accusatory.

On day three, we stopped for the night in Amarillo, pretty tired by now.
Once more we put out food, water and the litter box for Bear, who, by now was looking pretty ticked off, and most definitely had lost all sense of humor. In the morning there was the usual small wet spot....and Bear was looking rather large around the middle.

On day four, by mid-afternoon, we made it into Albuquerque and finally pulled up in front of our new home. My daughter opened the door of the van to get out and a streak of gray furry lightning shot past her and bounded out of sight before she could blink! It was as if Bear knew we'd come to the end of our journey....and he had reached the end of his patience! There was no point in trying to chase him...he was outta there!

**I want to add a little note here: living here in Ohio, we were used to grayish, gloomy skies most of the time; it's just how it is. During the trip, we hit some pretty bad weather, especially in Oklahoma and Texas....but, it was really amazing that the minute we hit the border of New Mexico, the rain stopped, the sun came out, the skies were the most beautiful shade of bright blue and the air was scented with the most wonderful fragrance...kind of sage/pine/thyme/wet sandy earth. It was a good omen; a "welcome to your new life". I felt such an immense sense of peace and happiness, such as I hadn't felt in way more years than I could count! We were home!

I will leave you here, until next time.

It is 7:01 pm on July 30, 2008.