Today is Mother's Day.
If you are lucky enough to still have your mother, say a little thank you to God. If you have lost her, as I have lost mine, then honor her memory by doing something kind for someone; something you know will make her proud.
As a mother, I can guarantee you that Moms don't want expensive material things from you. You don't have to run around town trying to find the "perfect gift". Give her the one gift she really wants: time with you, a phone call, a few words from you telling her you love her and are grateful for everything she did for you...and if you find it difficult to verbally express your feelings, find a card that will say it for you. (I still have cards my kids gave me from the time they were little.)
Yes, I know, not everyone has a great mother. There are some who are terrible; who never should have given birth at all, and if you had a mother like that, you have my sympathy..but let that go now and forgive her. That's a gift you can give to her... (as well as to yourself) this Mother's Day.
NO mother is perfect! My own had her problems and weaknesses, and we certainly had our battles. But, I'll tell you this: I knew I was loved! And I know she did the best she could with the tools she had. I lost her on Christmas Day, 1978 and I'd give anything to be able to see her and hug her on this...and all the Mother's Days past since then!
When I became a mother, I vowed I would not make the same mistakes...but you can bet I made others. Fortunately, my three children still love and respect me, and they know they were loved above all else. They are grown, they are wonderful people, and two of them have children of their own and are great parents; (the third, my son, and his wife, have opted for the 4-legged "kids" and those animals couldn't have a better set of "parents"!)...they constantly amaze me at how wise and loving they are with their children. I tell them all the time how proud I am of them and I tell them every time I talk to them how much I love them...and every time they tell me they love me, I feel like I've been given the best gift in the world!
Take every opportunity...not just one day a year...to express your love to your mom...or to whomever took that role in your life...because tomorrow is promised to no one...and Time is a thief.
Saturday, May 7, 2011
Thursday, April 7, 2011
A SMALL DIFFERENCE
I have been experimenting with something.
There is so much negativity in this world and people are rushing, stressed, inconsiderate, and seemingly uncaring about the feelings of others on a day-to-day basis. We seem to have lost the knack of simple courtesy and kindness. Rudeness seems to be the acceptable way of walking through life these days and reality TV, unfortunately, glorifies the morons who act like undisciplined two-year-olds. Sadly, the more ignorant and outrageous they act, the more attention they get.
Oh, many people will step up when there's a disaster somewhere in the world, or if they see something heart-tugging on the news...but, I'm talking about just the every day interactions we all encounter when dealing with others: clerks in grocery stores, customers, the wait staff at a restaurant, etc.
Many times I have been very pleased with the service I've been given by someone but didn't take the time to actually tell them so....but many more times (more often than not) I do compliment a server in a restaurant because they can make or break your dining experience. If you are spending your hard-earned money for a meal out, the last thing you want to deal with is a surly server! And by the same token, no server wants to deal with a nasty customer...(and do you really want spit..or worse...in your food?) But I also know first hand what a tough job it is to be a server in a restaurant! I tried it and was horrible at it and it gave me a true appreciation for anyone who can do that job well and keep a smile on their face!
There are just some people you encounter that you do NOT want to anger, ever! Your doctor, your lawyer, your housekeeper, (she knows everything about you) and anyone who serves you food, just to mention a few! That's just common sense.
But I'm talking about the every day people with whom we all come in contact. How often do you actually stop and tell someone that they've done a great job, or that you appreciate their efforts, or that they've made your day better? But please don't be insincere or condescending. First of all, most people can see right through that anyway, and there's no reason to insult someone's intelligence. But when someone does a really good job or goes that extra mile to help you in whatever capacity the situation calls for, why can't we take that little tiny bit of time to tell them we appreciate them? Just a few words is all that's necessary.
And what might be the trickle down effect? Maybe that person you made smile and feel appreciated will turn around and be kind to someone else who otherwise would possibly have done something nasty to yet another because they were feeling bad that day...and what you did, those few moments you took to make someone smile may have turned what could have been a bad situation into something positive. Think about it.
So, my experiment is to make at least two people feel good each day..whether it's someone I've come into direct contact with, or someone on the Internet via my Facebook page or an email. I've begun doing just that...and the results have been amazing.
The other day at the grocery store a young man about 19 or so was checking out my groceries. He was quiet...just doing his job, not really engaging me as a customer as he scanned each item. Not being rude or abrupt, but just quiet. Then he looked up and asked me if I wanted something in a plastic bag. (I had brought my own cloth reusable bags). I smiled at him and said, "No. I don't want to use plastic at all if I don't have to..I'm trying to do something good for the planet...so it can be passed on to kids like you...and hopefully, you'll do a better job." He stopped and looked at me and then cracked up. Then I said, "You know, so many people think kids these days are so bad, but I don't agree. I mean, look at you...here you are working hard when you could be out acting a fool instead." His whole face just lit up with the biggest smile and his whole demeanor changed. We chatted a bit and then I said, "It's a nice day, I'll bet you'd rather be outside doing something fun..yet, here you are." That smile just got bigger. He said, "Thank you! I appreciate that!" (and I could tell it really meant something to him to be acknowledged.) I told him that I appreciated the fact that he was there taking care of me instead of running the streets causing trouble, and that I was glad he was the one whose checkout stand I chose because it was nice talking to him.
As I rolled the cart away, I looked back at him and he was looking after me, still smiling that big smile and it stayed with him as he turned and began checking out the next customer. I hope he felt good the rest of the day, and when he feels discouraged I hope he remembers our conversation.
My next stop was the pet store right next to the grocery store. My dog, Poppy, has been very sick for the past 8 weeks, going through a very serious surgery and slowly recovering after finally having to have a feeding tube put in because she hasn't been eating. It's been a nightmare..for her and for me, with multiple pill doses and tube feedings every day starting at 7:00 a.m. and ending at 11:00 p.m. The goal is to get her eating regularly so the tube can be removed, so I'd been tearing out my hair trying to find something, anything that will tempt her to eat...and it's been a real challenge.
I finally decided to go to a pet store about 5 days before and see what kinds of dry foods they have. She has to have something very low-fat because pancreatitis is one of her problems, and as fussy as she's been I just didn't know what to try next.
The manager, a young girl about maybe 22 or 23, came up to me and asked if she could help and I explained the situation to her. She dropped everything and we spent about 1/2 hour looking at different foods, checking labels, discussing Poppy's needs. She asked a lot of questions. She really knew her stuff, and after eliminating several foods she recommended this one that happened to be relatively new and had sample 1 lb bags for $2.99 (with a $3.00 coupon on the back towards a larger size if you liked it) and it was a natural, holistic, low-fat food, so I figured I couldn't lose.
She was patient, concerned, caring and never made me feel like I was "bothering" her, and she made sure I was happy with the food choice before I walked up to that register.
When I got home, I opened the bag and poured out a little for Poppy, hoping it would at last be something she liked....and bam! She pounced on that food and ate every bit I'd given her. I could have cried I was so happy.
So when the bag was empty, I went back for more after I did my grocery shopping.
I didn't see this young lady, but I asked the girl at the register about her, described her and the girl said she was in the back. They called her up to the register and I told her just how much I appreciated what she did for me the other day and how happy I was when Poppy ate the food she'd helped me pick out, and that I was grateful for all the time she spent and her knowledge and professionalism.
Again, her face just lit up and I could tell how good it made her feel to be appreciated and that she had made a difference.
But I won't stop there. I asked for the corporate phone number and I will let them know that they have a top-notch employee working at that location because, again, who knows what the trickle down effect will be?
And that's my point. When you make someone feel bad they will take it out on the next person with whom they come in contact...so why can't the reverse be true?
So, my challenge to myself...and to you...is to make at least two people each day glad they came into contact with you, in whatever capacity. It's way easier than you think...and the added benefit is that you will feel good too.
And, can it hurt to put more positive energy out into the Universe? God knows we need it!
There is so much negativity in this world and people are rushing, stressed, inconsiderate, and seemingly uncaring about the feelings of others on a day-to-day basis. We seem to have lost the knack of simple courtesy and kindness. Rudeness seems to be the acceptable way of walking through life these days and reality TV, unfortunately, glorifies the morons who act like undisciplined two-year-olds. Sadly, the more ignorant and outrageous they act, the more attention they get.
Oh, many people will step up when there's a disaster somewhere in the world, or if they see something heart-tugging on the news...but, I'm talking about just the every day interactions we all encounter when dealing with others: clerks in grocery stores, customers, the wait staff at a restaurant, etc.
Many times I have been very pleased with the service I've been given by someone but didn't take the time to actually tell them so....but many more times (more often than not) I do compliment a server in a restaurant because they can make or break your dining experience. If you are spending your hard-earned money for a meal out, the last thing you want to deal with is a surly server! And by the same token, no server wants to deal with a nasty customer...(and do you really want spit..or worse...in your food?) But I also know first hand what a tough job it is to be a server in a restaurant! I tried it and was horrible at it and it gave me a true appreciation for anyone who can do that job well and keep a smile on their face!
There are just some people you encounter that you do NOT want to anger, ever! Your doctor, your lawyer, your housekeeper, (she knows everything about you) and anyone who serves you food, just to mention a few! That's just common sense.
But I'm talking about the every day people with whom we all come in contact. How often do you actually stop and tell someone that they've done a great job, or that you appreciate their efforts, or that they've made your day better? But please don't be insincere or condescending. First of all, most people can see right through that anyway, and there's no reason to insult someone's intelligence. But when someone does a really good job or goes that extra mile to help you in whatever capacity the situation calls for, why can't we take that little tiny bit of time to tell them we appreciate them? Just a few words is all that's necessary.
And what might be the trickle down effect? Maybe that person you made smile and feel appreciated will turn around and be kind to someone else who otherwise would possibly have done something nasty to yet another because they were feeling bad that day...and what you did, those few moments you took to make someone smile may have turned what could have been a bad situation into something positive. Think about it.
So, my experiment is to make at least two people feel good each day..whether it's someone I've come into direct contact with, or someone on the Internet via my Facebook page or an email. I've begun doing just that...and the results have been amazing.
The other day at the grocery store a young man about 19 or so was checking out my groceries. He was quiet...just doing his job, not really engaging me as a customer as he scanned each item. Not being rude or abrupt, but just quiet. Then he looked up and asked me if I wanted something in a plastic bag. (I had brought my own cloth reusable bags). I smiled at him and said, "No. I don't want to use plastic at all if I don't have to..I'm trying to do something good for the planet...so it can be passed on to kids like you...and hopefully, you'll do a better job." He stopped and looked at me and then cracked up. Then I said, "You know, so many people think kids these days are so bad, but I don't agree. I mean, look at you...here you are working hard when you could be out acting a fool instead." His whole face just lit up with the biggest smile and his whole demeanor changed. We chatted a bit and then I said, "It's a nice day, I'll bet you'd rather be outside doing something fun..yet, here you are." That smile just got bigger. He said, "Thank you! I appreciate that!" (and I could tell it really meant something to him to be acknowledged.) I told him that I appreciated the fact that he was there taking care of me instead of running the streets causing trouble, and that I was glad he was the one whose checkout stand I chose because it was nice talking to him.
As I rolled the cart away, I looked back at him and he was looking after me, still smiling that big smile and it stayed with him as he turned and began checking out the next customer. I hope he felt good the rest of the day, and when he feels discouraged I hope he remembers our conversation.
My next stop was the pet store right next to the grocery store. My dog, Poppy, has been very sick for the past 8 weeks, going through a very serious surgery and slowly recovering after finally having to have a feeding tube put in because she hasn't been eating. It's been a nightmare..for her and for me, with multiple pill doses and tube feedings every day starting at 7:00 a.m. and ending at 11:00 p.m. The goal is to get her eating regularly so the tube can be removed, so I'd been tearing out my hair trying to find something, anything that will tempt her to eat...and it's been a real challenge.
I finally decided to go to a pet store about 5 days before and see what kinds of dry foods they have. She has to have something very low-fat because pancreatitis is one of her problems, and as fussy as she's been I just didn't know what to try next.
The manager, a young girl about maybe 22 or 23, came up to me and asked if she could help and I explained the situation to her. She dropped everything and we spent about 1/2 hour looking at different foods, checking labels, discussing Poppy's needs. She asked a lot of questions. She really knew her stuff, and after eliminating several foods she recommended this one that happened to be relatively new and had sample 1 lb bags for $2.99 (with a $3.00 coupon on the back towards a larger size if you liked it) and it was a natural, holistic, low-fat food, so I figured I couldn't lose.
She was patient, concerned, caring and never made me feel like I was "bothering" her, and she made sure I was happy with the food choice before I walked up to that register.
When I got home, I opened the bag and poured out a little for Poppy, hoping it would at last be something she liked....and bam! She pounced on that food and ate every bit I'd given her. I could have cried I was so happy.
So when the bag was empty, I went back for more after I did my grocery shopping.
I didn't see this young lady, but I asked the girl at the register about her, described her and the girl said she was in the back. They called her up to the register and I told her just how much I appreciated what she did for me the other day and how happy I was when Poppy ate the food she'd helped me pick out, and that I was grateful for all the time she spent and her knowledge and professionalism.
Again, her face just lit up and I could tell how good it made her feel to be appreciated and that she had made a difference.
But I won't stop there. I asked for the corporate phone number and I will let them know that they have a top-notch employee working at that location because, again, who knows what the trickle down effect will be?
And that's my point. When you make someone feel bad they will take it out on the next person with whom they come in contact...so why can't the reverse be true?
So, my challenge to myself...and to you...is to make at least two people each day glad they came into contact with you, in whatever capacity. It's way easier than you think...and the added benefit is that you will feel good too.
And, can it hurt to put more positive energy out into the Universe? God knows we need it!
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